Thursday, August 1, 2019

Any bad female tendencies? Resistance to adoption?



I said before that men have <moretendencies to be violent> than women do. Other male-specific bad behaviors are some tendency to rape or coerce sex, and some tendency to abandon middle-aged wives for younger women.

Of course women sometimes behave badly in various ways, but in most cases men behave badly in the very same ways, often with greater frequency or severity. Women may undercut other women unfairly in search of higher status, but men undercut other men as well -- sometimes with their fists.

I have struggled to come up with any tendency women have to not do the right thing (as understood by modern morality) based on evolutionary tendencies. Of course, there simply might not be any. Evolution has no requirement to be balanced or fair. "Fairness" enters evolutionary considerations very narrowly within humans and some other animals where a concern for it is likely an evolved trait that can be studied like any other.

One idea is the reluctance of women to give up babies for adoption even when they intellectually understand that the child would have a better life with someone else. If a new mother is very young, single, poor, and/or has serious emotional or psychological problems, a carefully screened adoptive couple would likely give the baby a better chance. Women are primed to take care of their babies, and in the environment we evolved in, giving a baby up so that someone else could raise it better would not have happened. A baby in a hunter-gatherer society who disappears is a dead baby and a source of enormous grief.

The clearest case is one where the mother would freely acknowledge that this isn't the best time for her to become a mother and she could do that later -- or a case where the mother already has other children. If the question is whether some troubled woman can ethically choose to raise a child or two at some point in her life or whether she should ethically give away any children she bears, that is much less clear. We intuitively feel that everyone (at least every woman) has a right to have and rear children, whatever her pluses and minuses are as a potential parent.

Society is tolerant and understanding of this strong predisposition in women to keep their babies even when it's not in the child's interest. I'm not sure why. Maybe readers can enlighten me. Maybe it's partly that committing to raising a child is a nurturing, positive thing when viewed in isolation.

Modern men are also reluctant to give a baby up for adoption, but I believe the tendency is much weaker.


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